Monday, January 16, 2012

Class One of the 40 Day Challenge, or Can You Write a Vampire Yogi

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So, we went to the 615 gentle class today because Miss Lorna had a dentist's appointment at 945 this morning and I'm going to give myself a pat on the back for not going, "well, we'll just skip today because..."

*grins*

That's the way you find yourself not going for 6 months.

I had a truly blergh sort of day and I have to admit, after practice I'm awake, I'm chipper, and I'm settled in my bones and ready to get to work.

Yesterday we had a welcoming ritual (my words, not Zelinda's) into the challenge and the question was raised, "why are you taking the challenge?" There were some lovely answers, and some truly funny ones. Some serious. Mine was honest -- I have a problem not taking a challenge. That's my thing. However...

Today I was considering the last few years. You see, I've gone through some huge physical changes -- I have lost half my body weight, I have become gluten-free, healthy, strong, and released from a chronic illness.

I also did something that I swore I'd never do last year.

I became obsessed with my weight.

Not my health. Not my quality of life.

My pants size.

I caught myself in December trapped in a cycle of dieting and hysterical exercise leading to injury and overtraining, poor eating choices and weight gain which led to dieting and...

Well, you're smart dogs, you get it.

This challenge is an excuse to be good to my soul, to the part of me that giggles during happy baby pose and cries sometimes during the deep twists, to breathe in deep.

What I want from life is me, not living inside my body like the victim in a house fire, but me. My body. My mind. My heart. My energy. One imperfect experiencing my own personal joy. My moving, living, maybe size 16 jeans instead of 12, healthy, laughing joy.

Otherwise I'm wasting precious opportunities to cause chaos and random acts of hysteria.

Speaking of hysteria... I have a confession to make.

During shavasana tonight, I had a vampire yogi make himself known. We haven't gotten to know each other very well yet, but one day soon there'll be a book cover with a toothy little guy during the downward dog. ;-)

Namaste, y'all.

S.

 

Class info:

Location: The Yoga Room

Class type: Gentle

Teacher: Zelinda

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